Small Tokens Of Love Strengthen The Relationship
In a healthy relationship, both partners accept their differences and strengthen their love by overcoming everyday difficulties.
Small gifts and tokens of love make an important difference in a relationship. They nourish them and cause tenderness and love to come to the fore in everyday life.
Not only love connects, but also the way two people treat each other day in and day out.
In order for the flame of love to stay alive, it must be respected and cared for like a garden that needs water to please us with its fruits or flowers.
Small details and attentions, small tokens of love can delight everyday life.
A hug, protection, help, care, a good night’s sleep, a movie together or a walk hand in hand. An unexpected “I love you”, a quick kiss … small, “unimportant” things.
Without small attentions, love loses its meaning and everyday life becomes monotonous and gray. Why this is so is not so important, love does not have to be understood but shown, every day and at every moment.
These little tokens of love feed the flame, not the passion, but the truly great feeling of being loved. It’s a lot easier than we are led to, often complicating our own lives.
In the end, you realize that the little things are always more important. A conversation at three in the morning, a spontaneous smile, a devastating photo that will make you laugh out loud, a ten-word poem that will make you tear up.
Books that nobody knows and that you love, a flower to decorate your hair with, a coffee that you drink alone … these are the things in life that are really worthwhile. Little things that make big moves.
True love and tokens of love
Love is nourished every day by details, attentions, worries and sometimes courage … Living love means waking up every day with just one person in mind, making them happy, caring for them, drying their tears of laughter, flattering them and giving them priority .
True love is not to ask, but to give. To love is not a synonym for submission or dependence, but for freedom and joy.
It is important not to confuse certain words: not detachment but a healthy attachment is the ideal. A secure sense of togetherness, affection that is free from insecurities and demands is the goal of a relationship.
Detaching means turning away, not loving – and this is a step out of not into the relationship.
But even romantic ideals like those in Walt Disney’s classics don’t get us any further.
How many times have we seen that a desirable relationship is based on intense dependency, which leads to emotional demands and unreal expectations.
True love is not perfect, it is honest. It is based on respect and trust. She can be recognized by complicit looks, kisses and tenderness. True love does not judge and leaves room for the other person.
Love lasts as long as you care for it and you care for it for as long as you want. That it consists of little touches is part of the theory we are all familiar with. In reality, however, we do not know how to put this into practice. Let’s think about it …
What do lasting relationships have in common?
Ideal love is just a mental construction to which we ascribe certain qualities that we would like to see in our life. But the reality is different: there is no magic formula for building a lasting, healthy relationship.
However, researcher John Gottman has defined 5 basic pillars on which happy couple relationships are based.
1. Admiration
Long-term relationships are capable of positively evaluating the characteristics of the partner. That does not mean simply praising the qualities of the partner, but showing appreciation.
2. Form a team
It is important to see the relationship as “we” not as “you on one side and me on the other”. This must be followed through to the last resort. This means that both partners are responsible for their relationship and their lives.
3. In-depth knowledge of the other and the relationship
Successful relationships know what interests the partner has and what they don’t like. They also express themselves openly and without fear.
4. Learn through difficulties
Long-term relationships speak of having overcome difficulties together and are therefore positive.
5. Acceptance is one of the tokens of love
Happy partners are also aware that there are difficulties that can be overcome and others to live with. They see being different as an advantage, not a disadvantage.
It’s not about looking for a perfect love, but an authentic, simple, and satisfying one. A good relationship does not mean never arguing, but rather resolving differences and living together with problems that cannot be resolved.
Lasting and happy partners are not those who are less different than others, but those who have the ability to understand, accept, and care for the other. Those who value small details and attentions and thus nourish their love on a daily basis.
Cover picture provided by Puuung
