Childhood Influences The Development Of Personality!

The bond that children develop with their parents at a young age is crucial for the development of personality and the future relationships they will have.

Childhood is a very important phase in which the development of personality takes place. Everything experienced in childhood  leaves traces in the brain  of which one is not aware, but which strongly influence many situations in adulthood. 

Why is positive reinforcement so important in personality development?

In raising children can  positive or negative reinforcement are used,  but it should always exist a balance.

• Positive reinforcement means praising the child for everything they do well and ignoring the negative things they are doing wrongly or not so well. This creates a high level of self-confidence, but these children are often unable to admit mistakes and take responsibility for them.

• Negative reinforcement means just the opposite. Everything that the child does badly is highlighted. This often leads to low self-esteem. The children think they are worth less than others.

Both of these extremes are bad and affect a child’s personality development. Therefore, looking back at childhood can be very helpful in identifying possible causes of current self-esteem problems.

The bond with their parents shapes children

Safe relationship

A secure bond arises when the mother satisfies all of the child’s needs.

There is physical contact and the child knows that his mother is always there when she needs her. This is how the child develops a healthy bond.

Insecure-ambivalent attachment

It also happens when the mother is very loving and attentive in some situations, but cold and dismissive in others. As a result, the child grows up with many insecurities.

Insecure-avoidant attachment

Insecure-avoidant attachment occurs when mothers are insensitive and ignore the needs of their children.

The children reject their parents, try to be independent and do not need their parents. Often times, this results in them having trouble developing relationships with others later.

As can be clearly seen, the secure bond is the healthiest. However, the other two are more common than you might think.

• Someone who grew up with an insecure, ambivalent bond with their mother runs the risk of experiencing emotional dependency in a later relationship. Affected people find it difficult to build a healthy relationship, and usually there is also a lack of assertiveness.
• Someone who has experienced an insecure-avoidant attachment often closes themselves emotionally and flees when someone gets too close. It is difficult for such people to develop solid relationships with others.

The development of personality during childhood

As you have probably realized, the development of a child’s personality depends very much on the reinforcement and attachment they experience from their parents, especially the mother.

One should therefore know how to give a child enough attention and protects it from relationship problems to build a secure attachment.

Unfortunately, parents often do not think about it and because of their many other obligations, such as work or household chores, the children often miss out.

It should therefore always be remembered that personality development takes place during childhood. Parents should therefore do everything possible to spare their children problems later on. Emotional dependence, the inability to relate to others, fears, insecurities in relationships … all of this doesn’t happen without a reason. And this reason is often hidden in childhood.